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But just as I was about to leave, Bob admitted that he was not that interested in me as a writing coach, but as a romantic prospect. Yet when I rejected him, he looked stung and startled, as though he was completely unaware of our significant age difference.
I thanked him for his interest, but let him know that that wouldn't be happening. He asked me to reconsider and retain “an open mind.” I felt frustration and anger boil up inside me as I looked at this man three decades my senior, who had manipulated me into a meeting under false pretences and then dismissed my refusal of his advances as close-minded. Instead, I ignored his emails until he finally gave up.
When my boyfriend came back I told him what happened.
I expected him to say something to the bartender or to at least be as upset as I was, but instead he told me that he was sorry, and that this was going to happen, but that we couldn’t let other people’s ignorance get in the way of our relationship.
At the meeting, we spent over an hour discussing his writing.
It seemed as if my friend's instincts were off, I thought. Earlier in our meeting, Bob described moving to the area as a 30-year-old in 1978 – the year I was born.
We know that it’s going to be strange to meet our folks, but we appreciate anything you can do to lighten the mood without overcompensating.” 10. When people see a couple with a significant age difference, they “I was prepared for the typical challenges you face when you’re a younger woman dating an older man, but nothing could have prepped me for the judgements that strangers felt they had the right to make about my boyfriend and I to both of our faces,” says Jasmine, 26.
When I set up a profile on Ok Cupid, I was inundated with messages from men in their late forties, fifties and even some in their sixties.
While I did get some messages from men closer to my own age, they were in the minority.
I thought back to the white-haired gentleman at the bar who was easily old enough to be my father and shook my head. Over the next couple of weeks, Bob sent me several samples of his writing without a trace of any innuendo or flirtation.
Eventually, we arranged to meet at a cafe near my apartment.