Internet dating and exclusivity

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They had great chemistry, great sex, and quickly coupled up.

They've also already taken weekend trips away to Arizona and Montreal without killing each other; and this honeymoon phase has been nonstop bliss for Heidi. On the couple's Arizona excursion, Heidi’s new beau asked her to get some directions on his phone.

As she did, a slew of texts and notifications filled her boyfriend's screen…

including one from Bumble announcing a new connection. "No, we're not." Apparently he just hadn't gotten around to deleting his dating apps; and his verbal agreement was the final confirmation Heidi needed.

A lot of people feed into this by keeping their options open even after entering monogamous relationships.

One might think, "Well, if I don't check the dating apps, it's fine that they're still on my phone!

There's of course no hard-and-fast rule for when to delete all the dating apps you've used in the past.

Gaining this level of clarity with one another lets you both determine whether it's time to let your online dating identity die.

" That's like saying, "Well, if I don't eat the rocky road ice cream, it's fine that it's still in my freezer!

" I don’t know about you, but I don't have enough self-restraint not to eat the ice cream (though I'm more of a butter pecan gal myself) or check the dating apps if they're constantly pinging me every time I have a match.

This prevents either of you from acting like a crazy person by spying on the other, accidentally discovering an active account like my friend Heidi did, or jumping to conclusions about the state of your relationship.

We could speculate day and night, but the reality of it is that we often don't know where the other person stands unless we ask.

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