Dating rules for men after first date

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"Asking her to attend your cousin's wedding four months down the road can scare her off," Chlipala says.

"It puts too much pressure on both of you." Bottom line: Plan your time with her, but don't make plans for your future until you're both ready for that step.7.

"Shut down whatever else you're doing—that includes electronic devices, but also just the noise in your head—and show up," says Thomas.

"There isn't anything more important than the connection you have with your date, and that comes from being truly present." 12.

Everything is new, you're both blinded by attraction, and there's no pressure to settle down or come to terms with the reality of a real relationship.

So hold off on those epic sweep-her-off-her-feet moves, Tran says.

Hoping she'll make the first move It's the 21st century—women are allowed to ask guys out, right?

Right, but that's not a pass for you to sit back and expect her to come to you, says dating coach JT Tran. "Hoping for a woman to make the first move is fighting a losing battle. Not paying for the first few dates In today's enlightened society, the question of who pays seems complicated. "Some things are just too ingrained in gender roles," Thomas says.

"If you invite her out on a fancy dinner date and show up with arms full of roses, chocolates, and teddy bears like you're celebrating the biggest Valentine's Day ever, you're putting a lot of pressure on her if you two aren't already an item," Tran explains. "Women in my office complain all the time that the men in their lives don't ask any questions, and aren't actually interested in the answers when they do," says Thomas.

"You've taken care of her, so she's going to wonder what you her to do to take care of you." Upping the ante so quickly forces her to make an uncomfortable choice: Does she go along with your crazy charade, or does she bail? Talking about yourself Everyone loves to talk about themselves. True story: If you ask her something about herself, be prepared to actually engage—if you don't, you look like a jerk who's only interested in himself and his own agenda.

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