Dating and mind games

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“If every time you bring up the 'girlfriend' concept he shuts down, the worst thing you can do is to put more pressure on him,” Oshima says.

“It's important to find out the reason why he's averse to the idea of a girlfriend.” It’s likely that this guy is flat-out terrified of commitment or has been hurt in the past.

You’re fabulous, and your guy should want to show you off, not keep you a secret. He’s gentle and kind, and he treats you like the princess you are.

But when you’re hanging out with him in a group setting, he suddenly enters douche mode and you’re left feeling confused and disgusted.

But the next day, he seemed kind of weird and distant. “It sounds like he's probably unsure of his feelings, or the feelings he experienced the night before may be something so new to him that it may be making him feel a little scared,” says Suzanne Oshima, a matchmaker and dating coach at Single in Stilettos.

Whether he’s feeling shaky about his emotions or your awesomeness intimidates him, one thing is certain—you won’t know for sure until you talk to him (and over text! In person, gently ask him what’s up with his behavior: “Hey, Mark, you’ve been acting a little distant lately. ” He may open up and have an amazing heart-to-heart with you.

You want somebody who’s secure enough to be nice all the time.

If he starts initiating the convos, awesome—you’ll know he is interested. Unless (and this is a big “unless”) there are other ladies around. Chatting it up with other women while you’re around him is totally rude, but there’s the possibility that he doesn’t even it as flirting. Let him know that it’s not cool to flirt in front of you— and be sure to use the word “flirt” so that he knows how you view it.I wish everyone could see the sweet guy that I see.” Give him time to fix his behavior after you’ve talked.If he does it again, Oshima says to “get up and walk out.” If he comes around, cut ties with this guy.Except for one minor little detail that you can’t stop stressing about—he never texts you first.“Don't chase,” says Tyler Young, dating coach and owner of Attractology.

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